Rambling...

How can happy songs make me feel so sad?

 Every time I watch the ending of the "All About Us" music video, I get chills. First, it feels sweet... But then you feel such a strong sense of... Loneliness.

 "Mine"? So cute. So nice, right? Not for me. What is it? No, I know. I'm a careless man's careful daughter too, and I know that can't be in my future. Up until the 2:45, maybe. After that is what I'd wish it would be.

 Sometimes I feel like I'd be more useful in the 1800's, when girls were made into gentle housewives by their families and never had to figure things out. Then again, I'd die after the first few days if I were born in the same condition, but that's besides the point.

 The future is a subject I always try to avoid because it seems so depressing. What can I even try to do? As socially awkward and uncomfortable as you can get, small and weak, lazy, slow, and I don't have my heart in anything except art, writing, and music. There isn't anything for me to do. Those passions are the ones you create and put out into the world for other people. But nobody would care about my stupid sketches or my pointless ramblings. And as for music, I'm instrumentally challenged to say the least of my problems.